Too many adults disrespect teens, and kids feel it.

Sixteen-year-old Justin quits his job on the spot when he is scheduled to work late two weekend nights in a row. “It’s not fair!” he later tells his angry dad. “No one else has to work late. Plus, the guys were going to a show.”

Fifteen-year-old Shawn swerves her mom’s car into the left lane to pass a slower driver, then makes a sharp right turn, across two lanes. “Relax, we’re fine,” she tells her terrified parents. “Besides, that guy was in my way,”

It’s easy to wonder: “What are these teens thinking?” As it turns out, new brain research shows us they’re not thinking—at least not in the way adults do.

Teen brains are a work in progress
Anyone who lives or works with adolescents knows that young people often use poor judgment and make decisions that are not well-considered. Now scientists can tell us why, thanks to new technologies such as photo-imaging that allows them to observe activity in a living brain. What they’ve learned is that the teen brain is still a work in progress, far from mature until well into the 20s.

“In teens, the prefrontal cortex is ‘asleep at the wheel,’” says Pat Crum, a nationally recognized parent educator and co-founder of the Family Nurturing Center of Western Michigan.

In fact, the frontal cortex is one of the last parts of the brain to mature, which causes big problems for teens—and the adults who care about them. That’s because the frontal cortex is the CEO of the brain, in charge of planning, organizing, setting priorities, making sound judgments, curbing impulses and calming unruly emotions.

And for teens, unruly emotions are a common event. It seems the limbic system of the brain—the seat of raw emotions like anger, fear, and elation—is revved up, in hyper-drive under the influence of sex hormones.

“Adults often assume that teens, who look older and are sexually mature, have a better grasp of consequences than they do,” says Crum. “Often adults interpret lack of skill as poor choices or misbehavior. In fact, teens are exhibiting their immature brain structure and not-yet-developed thinking skills.”

And that’s not all. Just consider a few additional “brain facts” about the teen years:

• The teen brain is developing so many connections, gray matter can sometimes double in one year. By about age 18, the connections “hard-wired” by experience are kept, and the rest will be pruned away. (Trouble is, these excess connections make it hard for teens to keep track of multiple thoughts.)
• New experiences, especially with an element of danger or thrill, create a chemical process in the brain that is intensely pleasurable to teens, more so than to either adults or children.
• After about age 14, almost all teens have a chemical tendency to get sleepy around 11 p.m. and wake up around 8 a.m. (With classes starting at 7:30 a.m., no wonder teens are chronically cranky.)
• Surges of testosterone—in boys and in girls—cause a rise in aggression and irritability. At the same time, serotonin levels decline during these years, leaving teens more impulsive and with fewer social skills.

• Teens are notoriously bad at reading social signals, even though they seem to do nothing but socialize. (If this seems like a recipe for daily drama and distraction, you’re right.)

  Teen years are packed with growth and learning
  Despite these challenges, Crum believes the high-energy, idealistic years of adolescence offer tremendous possibility. Remember that burst of brain cell production? It’s actually similar to the one that occurs during the first three years of life, making the teen years the “last best chance” to set patterns for adult behavior.

  “The idea that the ‘window of opportunity’ closes after age three is a myth,” says Crum. “Adolescence provides a grand opportunity for growth and change.”

  At the Family Nurturing Center, Crum helps teens understand that, in a sense, they are creating their own brains. What they choose to learn or experience will be “hard-wired” and kept. Which is why it’s so important for teens to experiment (within limits) and try out their talents, even to the point of becoming someone different every day. However, she points out that not all choices make for brighter futures. Choosing drugs, alcohol or tobacco will harm their brains—permanently.

  Teens need time, teaching, tenderness
  All this means adults are not yet off the hook. Teens still need the kind of time and attention we devoted to their first burst of brain development—during their toddler days.

  “Parents of teens often pull back too soon,” says Crum. “No matter how mature they look, they need the involvement of their parents and other adults who care.

  This involvement should look different than it did when kids were younger, though. They need mentoring, support and guidance—not the hands-on control we used through early childhood.

  Oh, and that caring part? It’s more important than you might guess. That’s because teens often “think” with their emotions, and they are very unlikely to learn from someone who doesn’t engage them at an emotional level.

  As technology improves, we can expect to discover even more about the way our kids’ brains learn, plan and make decisions. Meanwhile, today’s research raises a few challenging questions about some adult decisions.

  Teaching chemistry and algebra at 7:30 a.m? Trying 12-year-olds as adults in criminal courts? Giving a 16-year-old the keys to a 3,000-pound vehicle that travels up to 110 miles per hour?

  What are we thinking?

  TALKING TO TEENAGERS
  experts say a large investment of time and energy during adolescence will pay huge dividends in setting patterns for adult behavior. Even troubled teens, with adequate support, can learn restraint, good judgment, and empathy.

  Tips for parents:
  1. Learn about brain development and adjust your expectations. Your teen isn’t trying to drive you nuts, and may not intend to rebel when she doesn’t follow through; her brain is just a tangled mess of emotion, hormones and competing connections right now.

  2. Don’t stop parenting. A hands-off, “you-need-to-make-your-own-mistakes” attitude is not a good philosophy. If you walk away, teens will get into trouble.

  3. Learn new parenting skills. Parents should shift their style from manager to consultant. Honor your teens’ emerging abilities, and teach them daily how to plan, prioritize and make rational decisions.

  4. Keep it simple. Asking teens to remember a series of directions is an unrealistic expectation.

  5. Provide thrills and chills in safe settings. Activities like white water rafting and rock climbing fulfill a need for teens which they might otherwise fill by shoplifting, risky driving or experimenting with drugs.

  Tips for schools and communities:

• Create “brain-compatible middle and high schools, where educators are aware of developmental realities and adjust their expectations to match. They respect teens, engage them at an emotional level, and provide opportunities to talk, move and be social.
• Start school later. The 38 communities that have tried it are finding it worth the struggle, showing more learning and less conflict and depression.
• Raise the driving age to 18. Automobile accidents are the single greatest cause of death in teens. You can teach young people to drive, but you can’t change their inability to make quick, judicious decisions.

• Punish less, teach more. Don’t give up on young people—even those who have committed crimes. These years offer amazing opportunities for change if we invest the time and effort.

  To Learn More….

• “The Myth of Maturity: What Teenagers Need from Parents to Become Adults,” by Terri Apter. (WW. Norton & Co, 2001)
• “Uncommon Sense for Parents with Teenagers,” by Michael Riera. (Celestial Arts, 1995)
• “Our Last Best Shot: Guiding Our Children Through Early Adolescence,” by Laura Sessions Stepp. (Riverhead Books, 2000)

• • “Romance of Risk: Why Teenagers Do the Things They Do,” by Lynn E. Ponton. (The Perseus Books Group, 1998) www.focusas.com/Adolescence.htm