Stay tuned to what your kids do online.

It’s the most popular seat in the house.

I’m talking about the computer station in my home office. It’s so popular, in fact, that we’ve upgraded our computing capacity in recent years to include a second desktop PC and a laptop for roaming.

We spend a fair amount of computer time on the serious stuff like school and work. I have to confess, however, that the real competition for screen time is driven by other interests: fashion, friends and fun.

Let’s face it. The internet can be an exciting place, not to mention a valuable tool for families. No wonder we fight for equal access.

The internet can also be a dangerous place for young people. The Pew Internet/Family Life Project found in 2007 that 32 percent of online teens have been contacted by someone with no connection to them or any of their friends. And 7 percent of online teens say they have felt scared or uncomfortable as a result of contact by an online stranger.

The same project found that about one- third of all teenagers who use the Internet say they have been targets of annoying and potentially menacing online activities—things like receiving threatening messages; having their private emails or text messages forwarded without consent; having an embarrassing picture posted without permission; or having rumors about them spread online.

While parents don’t need to scare their children, they should make kids aware of the potential risks that can exist online and talk with them about ways to minimize those risks.

Since the children I know and love rarely took my word for anything when they were growing up, I suggest you do a little research first. That way you can come armed with other people’s facts. Here are some places to begin:

The internet safety site of the Michigan State Police at www.michigan.gov/msp offers information for both parents and children. You can even download a pledge for online safety that you and your children can sign. You’ll also find links and phone numbers for reporting “Cyber Creeps.”

Read campaigns from the National Center for Missing & Exploited Children (NCMEC) atmissingkids.com, such as HDOP: Help Delete Online Predators. The NCMEC site includes guidelines for kids of all ages, and an internet safety quiz for kids.

Watch real-life stories about victims of Internet exploitation atNetSmartz.org. Discuss what happened to these victims and how you and your children can work together to help keep them safer online. NetSmartz provides a wealth of materials designed to open the lines of communication with your children about online safety.

If you’ve already talked about Internet Safety, but your advice has fallen on deaf ears, it might be time to pay extra attention to your child’s internet time.

The Michigan State Police offer the following signs that might mean your child is at-risk online:

• Your child spends large amounts of time online, especially at night. 
• You find pornography or other “banned” material on your child’s computer. 
• Your child receives telephone calls from someone (particularly an adult) you don’t know, or is making telephone calls, sometimes long distance, to telephone numbers you don’t recognize. 
• Your child receives mail, gifts, or packages from someone you don’t know. 
• Your child turns the computer off or quickly changes the screen when you come into the room. 
• Your child is using an online account belonging to someone else.

• Your child becomes withdrawn from the family.

  If it turns out someone in the family has come across something that makes them feel uncomfortable, it’s time to take action. Anyone can report instances of online child exploitation to the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children’s Cyber Tipline at missingkids.com. Or, report a Cyber Creep at 1-877-5CYBER3.

  More Resources
  For parents:
  netsmartz411.org
  PointSmartClickSafe.org

  For kids:
  netsmartzkids.org
  Michigan 4-H Youth Development

  Have trouble keeping up with the kids?
  Below are some sources from the State Educational Technology Directors Association’s Media Literacy toolkit at www.setda.org. They can help parents stay tuned with what kids are doing online, both good and bad. 

• Totally Wired A website by Anastasia Goodstein that reveals “what teens and tweens are really doing online.” (2007) 
• Net Family News A nonprofit public service newsletter that will keep you up-to-date on news and issues relating to kids and the internet.

• “Cyber Safe Kids, CyberSavvy Teens: Helping Young People Learn to Use the Internet Safely and Responsibly, “ Nancy E. Willard (Jossey Bass, 2007). This book takes a look at how to keep kids safe online and help them become smart, savvy and productive users of the online world.